and then we jumped ourselves silly!

A friend of mine had passes for this new place in town that has wall to wall trampolines, so the other night we decided to check it out. First, they have you sign a waiver (of course). Next, you put on these wide high top bootie/shoes; I guess so the trampolines stay clean or maybe just to make you look like a geek and no cute single dads come near you. If you are under 18, they also give you a helmet to wear. So, we all hurried up and got decked out in our gear, ran out to the trampolines, and proceeded to JUMP OURSELVES SILLY!!! It was really great. I guess my inner cheerleader came out because I was doing straddle jumps and herkies. I even did some roundoffs. Not bad for an old lady! Then my daughter wanted to play dodge ball, so we were jumping and throwing these cushy balls at each other. It seemed like we jumped for hours. But really it was only about 20 minutes before I needed to sit down and rest due to my heart pounding out of my chest and all. When our time was finally up, and we left, I noticed my ears were buzzing like I had just been to a loud concert. I thought maybe it was just loud in there, but no, apparently I really did JUMP MYSELF SILLY. Or maybe just the fluid in one of my ears!

How to Get A Husband... According to 6th Graders

I have a boy in my class who just became a big brother a few weeks ago. We had a few free moments and he was proudly showing us her picture, and mentioned that her room is decorated in a monkey theme. I told the kids that my daughter's room was done up in bunnies, but if I ever have a baby boy, I want to do the room in red with cowboys. Well, they all looked at me and began freaking out: are you having another baby?! when?! what?! I told them to hold on, slow down, that I would like to be married before I even think about going and having another baby. Suddenly, one little girl piped up and said "Here is what you need to do. Get a friend to watch your daughter. Then get a pedicure. And you need to go shopping and buy some of those booty shorts. And get those fishnet things too. Then you go dance at the dance club." Then another kid pipes up, "I hear that Club S is really cool. Are you over 21?" By this time, I was trying hard to keep a straight face, and was not doing a very good job. These kids are so funny!

SWAN Night!

A few years back a girl friend of mine from work decided to start a tradition for all the single girls to go out on Valentine's Day together. It was called SWAN for Single Woman Appreciation Night. The first year I felt a little bummed to be single, you know- alone on Valentine's Day and all that, but it was pretty fun to have some friends to spend a fun evening out with. Over the years, though I have come to look forward to it. I bring my daughter along (because she is a SWAN too!), and we meet up with all the girls for a nice dinner at a cool restaurant. Last year, I mentioned my plans to a married lady from church, and was surprised that she seemed jealous. She told me that truly she would rather be going out with us because it sounded like such fun to her. So, to all the single ladies out there, call up your girlfriends and find somewhere fun to go out tomorrow night- no sitting home feeling sorry for yourself- IT'S SWAN NIGHT! Happy Valentine's Day!

what a girl wants

Apparently, another kid in my daughter's class was talking about his mom having a date and her teacher said that my daughter piped up and said she was glad that she doesn't have to share me with anyone. So her teacher asked her doesn't she want to have her mommy find a nice boyfriend and she told her no, that she likes having me all to herself.
Then the other day I was visiting my dad in the hospital and I was telling him that I am planning on him walking me down the aisle someday, so he better get well. He said yeah, I guess because it may be awhile. Ha, ha, ha. Then, one of the male nurses comes in and my dad says to him "my daughter needs a man". He said "sorry, I can't help with that". He left the room as I was trying to figure out whether he was gay or married, when my dad looks over at me and says, "hey, your zipper was down". Classy.
I have been single for a while now and I enjoy my life with my daughter, so a guy would have a large bill to fill for me to want to go out on a date at this point in my life. After all, going on a date as a single mom involves finding a babysitter that does not charge an arm and a leg. Picking her up to bring to your house, and then waking up your kid to take her home at the end of the night. Not to mention actually applying makeup to my face and lotion to my legs. (I am still working on that) Oh yeah, and shaving them too. Probably I would have to paint my toenails too. My kid will usually do that for me if I pay her a dollar, but she puts polka dots on them.
Anyway, on to him. If I did go on a date, I would like to go out with a good old Florida boy. I love Florida- being on the water, hanging out at the beach, swimming, fishing, so I would like to date a guy that likes that too. One with a boat. Oh yeah, and a job and car and the liking kids part too. But did I mention a boat?